It certainly took him long enough.

His Serene Highness Prince Albert of Monaco–Grace Kelly’s 52-year-old American-educated, American-accented bachelor son, who has been harassed for literally decades as family, friends and royal watchers wondered when he’d bite the dust–has finally become engaged.

The future Mrs. Monaco is South African Olympic swimmer Charlene Wittstock, who Albert’s been dating for several years, having previously tussled with Hollywood beauties including Claudia Schiffer, Brooke Shields and Angie Everhart.

Albert’s refusal to marry put Monaco into a precarious position. Prior to 2002, if Albert had died without a legitimate heir, the Principality of Monaco would have reverted to France, and the country as we know it would have ceased to exist.  (Um, how’s that for pressure?)  After the constitutional change in 2002, however, Albert’s sister HRH Princess Caroline of Hanover (and her son Andrea Casiraghi, who has no title) is now in line for the throne. Albert already has at least 2 children, including a son, but they’re illegitimate, so tough luck there, kiddies.

Today I had been planning to go to Stockholm to see some friends and soak up the atmosphere before Crown Princess Victoria’s wedding, but I decided to be responsible instead, save money and hang around London.  (I spent the day doing extremely tedious but necessary work, lest you think my entire existence consists of traveling and spas.  Only on alternate days.  We kid!)

I ended up having a (semi) royal experience of an entirely different kind: a friend dragged me to Harrods for a Brummel magazine party celebrating dashing explorer Tom Avery and his recent book To The End of the Earth, which chronicles his journey as the youngest Briton (and part of the fastest team ever) to reach the South Pole.  (Incidentally, Tom is also one of only 41 people to ever conquer both the South Pole and the North Pole.  Underachiever, that one.)

Lo and behold, who shows up 10 seconds after me but Kate Middleton’s younger sister Pippa Middleton!  (So we saw the Queen on Sunday and Pippa on Tuesday.  Might we garner a Wills ’n Kate run-in by Saturday?  Fingers crossed.)  Pippa was with a gorgeous, impeccably groomed blond guy, who I spotted even before she arrived.  (He was neither Charlie Gilkes, who she was rumored to be dating–though I’m not sure if it’s still on–nor Ali Spencer-Churchill, George Percy, Ed Horner, JJ Jardine Paterson, Sam Branson, nein, nein, nein…)  She wore an outfit that can only be described as classic prepster: fitted navy blazer, white knee-length cotton skirt, brown belt, navy loafers, gold aviator glasses perched on top of her head, and a single gold ring on her middle finger.  (Yes.  Clearly I was staring.) 

[For those who care about the other breathless details, she's surprisingly tall--I was standing about 6 inches behind her, and pegged her as at least 2 inches above my 5' 6"--and extremely, resolutely, very slender.  With the exception of too-heavily-rimmed eyes and a deep nut-brown tan that ages her, she's quite pretty and is exceedingly better-looking and cuter than in photos.]

Her friend waved her over, fetched her a glass of champagne, and together they listened quietly with the rest of the attendees as Tom recounted his survival stories, showed photos from his expeditions, and cracked jokes about getting lost in Antarctica and having to ask for directions.  (Did you know there’s a gift shop at the South Pole?  No, really.)  Pippa and her friend stayed for an entire hour on the edge of the small crowd, drinking champagne and nibbling canapes and waiting to leave until after the grand prize raffle was announced: a trip to the Verdura Golf Resort in Sicily, owned by hotelier Sir Rocco Forte, who I interviewed over cocktails last month. 

Then, with copies of Tom’s book tucked under their arms, they grabbed gift bags and slipped out the back door of Harrods onto Hans Road, setting off for whatever adventures might await the sister of the future Queen and a well-dressed blond toff on a cozy June night.

:Jazz-hands:  London!

Should you find yourself in Sweden this summer (hey, I don’t know your glamorous travel plans–it could happen!), there are two things I suggest you do:

1) Attend the wedding of HRH Crown Princess Victoria to her personal-trainer fiance Daniel Westling.  Tell ‘em Jolie says hej.

2) Visit Raison d’Etre spa, which looks amazing.

To help celebrate the wedding of the future Queen, Stockholm’s new Raison d’Etre, which opened last fall in the Grand Hotel Stockholm, will be offering pampering specials throughout the entire month of June.  (Crown Princess Victoria and Daniel Westling are due to marry on June 19th, and the egalitarian Swedish are reportedly scandalized by her sexist decision to have her father, King Carl XVI Gustaf, walk her down the aisle and give her away.)

Services include a 3 hour Royal Treatment experience featuring sauna, cranberry and silk scrub, wrap, Jacuzzi, hair pack and face mask–with champagne and nibbles served in a suite overlooking the castle–for approximately £625.   Still not pampered enough?  How about The Complete works for £860 per person, featuring 6.5 hours of spa extravagance including a steam, scrub, wrap, massage, lunch, facial, manicure, pedicure, bath, champagne, head massage and makeup application. (Phew!  All that beautifying sounds exhausting!)

Spa packages start at £260 for a one-night stay for two.

Hmm.  I’ll be in Europe for half of June and have not yet visited Sweden.  Maybe a quick jaunt to Stockholm?  (Rendezvous with recently single, age-appropriate, totally gorgeous Prince Carl Philip, anybody…?)

Oh, it’s on.

According to Tina Brown on The Daily Beast this week, there is speculation that Prince William and Kate Middleton will announce their engagement on June 3rd or June 4th, with a wedding to follow in November.  Keep in mind, however, it’s all theoretical at this point, solely based off Tina’s intel regarding blacked-out dates in the Palace Diaries (the royal calendar).

Today, England was abuzz with speculation, a source close to Wills telling the Daily Mail, “Prince William has never given the merest hint about what is on his mind regarding his relationship with Kate Middleton and his office is under the clear impression that if he does decide to pop the question, they will only be told a matter of days or even hours before he wants the world to know.”

A wedding this year would make sense: Prince William is due to begin a 3 year search-and-rescue tour of duty with the RAF in January 2011.  Considering the age of the Prince Phillip (he turns 90 in June 2011), the miserable mental state of the British people (weddings are cheery, uplifting affairs) and the fact that Queen Elizabeth–with whom William is very close, and presumably wants to please–celebrates 60 years on the throne in February 2012 (something William wouldn’t want to distract from)…

Well, it certainly all adds up.

For now, all we can do is wait and see.  Kate Middleton, you are so very close…!

It all comes back to Grace Kelly, really.  (Maybe Audrey Hepburn could hold her own in the Battle of the Classic Stars, but that’s about it!  I know there are some Marilyn aficionados who’d hotly disagree…)

My mother was fascinated by Grace Kelly, so I was raised on a steady diet of Grace bios and was scandalized/delighted by juicy tidbits about her supposed secret nymphomania.  If I remember correctly–allegedly–she even lost her virginity to her best friend’s husband at the age of 17.  Who knows?

Next month, the Victoria & Albert museum in London will feature a Grace Kelly exhibit, with clothes and items from her Philadelphia Main Line childhood through her Hollywood days and finally culminating in her years as Princess of Monaco.  I’m tentatively planning a trip to London in June–my fingers are crossed the exhibit will still be around when I’m there!

Check out Vanity Fair’s cover article on Grace here, and see the slideshow of classic Grace photos here.

I adore Tatler magazine.  How could any gin-swilling, wellie-wearing, Queen-loving Anglophile not?  For 300 years, it has chronicled aristos, politicos, the rich and the hopelessly naff–sometimes one and the same–all with its trademark cheek and intelligence.  (Plus, pretty party people!  And polo!  And Kate Middleton!)

The website, I am sorry to report, is complete and utter crap.  It exists…but barely, with no society blog (I recommend a peek at the sublime Vanity Fair Society and Style blog, Tatler editors!), no links to the articles in the magazines, no party photos…nothing.  It boggles the mind–you are missing a huge opportunity, Tatler!  Redesign immediately, and then you can take over the new media world for the next 300 years.

Still, you’re my favorite magazine, always and forever.  Happy Birthday!

Here’s a link to photos and videos from Tatler’s 300th anniversary party…um…on the British Vogue website.  (I rest my case.)